Romance scams online: recognise a fabricated relationship before the money requests
A romance scam usually starts with closeness, trust and the feeling of a special relationship, not a request for money. Conversations can last weeks or months before an emergency, investment or plea for financial help appears.
What is happening?
Choose the situation that fits. Taking time to separate feelings from verifiable facts can reduce the room for further manipulation.
We are only chatting
The relationship is intense, but parts of the story or behaviour do not add up.
See the steps →They started asking for money
A flight, illness, customs fee, investment, emergency or another financial request has appeared.
See the steps →I sent intimate images or identity documents
You are worried about blackmail, identity misuse or further pressure.
See the steps →I already sent money
You paid, and another request or a new explanation has arrived.
See urgent steps →How a romance scam develops
Time is part of the manipulation. A relationship and trust come first, followed by a request that would have seemed suspicious at the start.
First contact
A dating site, Facebook, Instagram, WhatsApp, Telegram or email.
Rapid closeness
Intense messages, compliments and personal topics very early on.
Moving the conversation
The conversation moves from the original platform to a private chat.
Creating exclusivity
“Only you understand me”, “I trust nobody else” or plans for a future together.
An obstacle to meeting
A deployment, work abroad, illness, family problem or repeated technical excuses.
The first request
A small sum, flight, phone, parcel, medical cost or investment.
Escalation
After the first payment comes another problem and another reason to postpone meeting.
Repeated emergencies can keep someone paying
The story explains both distance and unavailability
Identities vary, but the story often serves the same purpose: build trust and explain why an in-person meeting is still impossible.
Soldier or deployed worker
They cannot travel, their account is restricted or they need travel money.
Doctor or aid worker
They claim to be abroad and facing a medical or travel problem.
Successful businessperson
They claim to have money but cannot currently access it.
Celebrity or public figure
The scammer uses a public figure’s photos and identity.
An attractive new partner
The profile looks ordinary and realistic, but the identity is fabricated.
Investor or finance professional
Romantic conversation turns into a cryptocurrency or investment recommendation.
Financial requests do not always look like “send me money”
After trust is established, the first request may seem like one-off help. It can also test whether you will follow instructions.
A flight to visit you
Only the final amount for travel or a booking change is supposedly missing.
Medical costs
An operation, medicine or illness supposedly needs urgent help.
Customs or a parcel
A gift or money parcel is supposedly held up and requires a fee.
A broken phone or laptop
Communication supposedly cannot continue without a new device.
Emergency help
A one-off transfer supposedly solves a temporary financial crisis.
A promising investment
The partner recommends a cryptocurrency, platform or “safe” investment account.
Receiving money through your account
You are asked to receive or forward someone else’s funds because the partner cannot use their own account.
Gift cards or cryptocurrency
Payment is requested through gift cards, a crypto ATM or another hard-to-recover method.
“Send something just for me” can become another form of control
Intimate images or videos may be presented as proof of closeness. Once sent, you cannot control who saves, copies or uses them.
Building trust
Intimate content is framed as proof of a relationship or special closeness.
Saving the material
Photos or videos can be copied and stored immediately.
A change of tone
Refusing money or contact can rapidly change the conversation.
Blackmail or pressure
The material can become a tool for threats, control or financial coercion.
When an online relationship needs closer scrutiny
One sign alone does not prove fraud. Several together are a reason to slow down and verify the facts.
Very early declarations of love
Strong feelings arrive before you really know each other.
Meetings keep being postponed
A new reason always prevents in-person contact.
Inconsistencies in the story
Work, age, country, family or the timeline changes.
Moving off the platform
Conversation quickly moves to a private chat.
Requests for money or gifts
The financial request follows a period of intense trust-building.
Requests for intimate content
Private material is demanded as proof of trust or love.
Isolation from other people
The partner claims your family or friends do not understand the relationship.
A new problem after every payment
Solving one situation always creates another reason to pay.
How to check safely
The aim is to verify the person and facts independently, without confrontation or sending more personal information.
Slow the relationship down
Pressure for immediate closeness is not a reason to hurry.
Check the photos
Use reverse image search to look for the same photos under other names. No match does not prove authenticity.
Look for inconsistencies
Compare work, age, country, family, photos and the timeline through independent sources.
Suggest an ordinary video call
Repeated technical excuses are a warning sign. A call can also be manipulated and does not prove the person’s identity or story; neither does a photo of an ID.
Tell someone outside the relationship
A trusted independent person may notice inconsistencies or pressure that are hard to see from inside the relationship.
What to do at each stage
Stop sending money and information. Save important records safely, without delaying urgent calls to your bank or other protective action.
We are chatting and something feels wrong
- Do not send money.
- Do not send identity documents or sensitive information.
- Check the photos and profile.
- Verify details independently.
- Show the conversation to someone you trust.
They started asking for money
- Send nothing further.
- Do not borrow money for the relationship.
- Do not pay for travel, customs or a “final fee”.
- Do not open a new account at their request.
- Pause contact and assess the situation independently.
I sent intimate images or identity documents
- Do not send more material.
- Do not pay for a promise of deletion.
- Preserve messages and threats; do not forward intimate material to other people.
- Secure accounts and change exposed passwords. If documents were shared, contact the issuer through official channels for advice on misuse.
- Report blackmail or threats to local police and seek trusted victim support. If under 18, tell a trusted adult promptly.
I already sent money
- Contact your bank or payment provider immediately through an independently verified channel.
- Send no further payments, including “recovery” fees.
- Keep accounts, amounts, times and payment confirmations.
- Save the profile and conversation safely.
- Report to local police or the relevant reporting service in your country.
- Preserve available evidence, then report and block the account. Do not prolong contact just to collect more evidence.
After a payment, speed matters
Contact the bank through an official channel rather than waiting for an explanation or repayment promise. Ask whether a payment can be stopped or recalled; recovery is not guaranteed.
What to keep
Preserve information connecting the profile, messages, claimed identity and payments. Do not publish accusations or private material yourself.
Profile and account URL
Profile link, username, platform and date.
Photos used by the account
Profile photos and other relevant images; the pictured person may also be a victim of identity misuse.
The conversation
Messages, emails, voice messages and key timeline details.
Phone numbers and email addresses
Contact details and accounts used during the conversation.
Bank and cryptocurrency details
Account numbers, wallet addresses, exchanges and other payment identifiers; never share wallet recovery phrases.
Payment confirmations
Amounts, dates, times, recipients and transaction confirmations.
Romance scams – FAQ
How can I recognise a fake dating profile?
Look for inconsistent stories, photos used under another name, rapid emotional attachment and repeated excuses about meeting or video calls. No single check proves an identity is genuine.
Does a video call prove the person is genuine?
No. It does not prove identity, honesty or the story behind a money request. Video can be manipulated, and a real person can still deceive you. Verify independently.
Why does a scammer chat for months?
Time builds trust. A financial request can then feel like helping someone close rather than paying a stranger.
Is every request for financial help a scam?
No, but a financial request in an online relationship with unverified identity is a serious warning. Do not send money; seek independent verification and advice.
What if I already sent money?
Contact your bank or payment provider immediately, stop payments, preserve messages and payment details and report to local police. No one can guarantee recovery.
What if I sent intimate images?
Send no more, do not pay for deletion promises and preserve threats safely. Report blackmail to local police and the platform; seek trusted support. Do not blame yourself for someone else’s abuse.
Could they ask to receive money through my account?
Yes. They may try to use your account to move money from other fraud. Do not forward unfamiliar funds; contact your bank independently if funds have arrived.
Where should I report romance fraud?
Report loss, blackmail or suspected crime to local police or your country’s reporting service. Report the profile to the platform too. DPP also accepts reports through its Czech form.
Suspect a romance scam?
Keep the profile, messages, contact details and payment records. A DPP report does not replace contacting your bank or local police.
Official prevention guidance
FBI: Romance scams (English) · Polizeiliche Kriminalprävention: Liebesbetrug (German)